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From: ecovingt@sdcc13.ucsd.edu (Maiko Covington)
Subject: Lyrics to "Louie Louie" as in Bloom County

Okay, you asked for it! Here are the parody lyrics to "Louie Louie" as printed in Bloom County (in the compilation "Night of the Mary Kay Commandos" - it's a color Sunday strip). Enjoy!

CAMPAIGN SPECIAL

On September 10th, each of the presidential campaigns was given a recording of the Kingsmen's 1963 classic party song, "Louie Louie". Each candidate was asked to do his best at deciphering the totally indecipherable lyrics. We found the results veeeery revealing. Below are the actual lyrics as written by R. Berry in 1955:

        Louie Louie, me gotta go
        Louie Louie, me gotta go
        Fine little girl she waits for me
        Me catch the ship for cross the sea
        Me sail the ship all alone
        Me never thinks me make it home
        (chorus)
        Three nights and days me sail the sea
        Me think of girl constantly
        On the ship I dream she there
        I smell the rose in her hair
        (chorus, guitar solo)
        Me see Jamaica moon above
        It won't be long, me see my love
        I take her in my arms and then
        Me tell her I never leave again

[Editors Note. The lyrics are also reprinted in _The Straight Dope_ by Cecil Adams on page 317. --TWC]

The lyrics to "Louie Louie" as heard by Michael Dukakis:

        Louie oo-i, we go go
        Louie oo-i, we go go
        If I lip curl away afro bee
        Catsup (expletive) cross from me
        Me sail ship o' state all alone
        Mar-aschino cherries at home
        (chorus)
        Greek mice he fail to see
        Need more tax, oh frequently
        Kitty she lead me ev'rywhere   <---- AHA!
        Ring in my-a nose, falafel hair
        (chorus, etc)

...As heard by George Bush:

        Louie Lou-i, Winne-bago
        Louie Lou-i, Winne-bago
        The wimp thing no no me
        Me catch shrapnel o'er sea
        Me toss Ann Richards a bone
        Meaner stinks meat bake it cone  <--- ?
        (chorus, garbled stanza)
        Mes-sy Paul Anka moons a dove  <--- Must mean something! ed.
        Ted Kennedy along, me like to shove
        Take Bent-sen and qualms begin
        Iran-Contra thing makes me phlegm
        (chorus)

...As heard by Bill D. Cat:

        Louie Lou-i, ne ga go  <--- reveals a simple honesty
        Louie Lou-i, ne ga go
        Ee fi li curl way fra nee <--- reveals a simple honesty
        Ee cat-ta shi fo kra-see
        Ne sait a shi auuuu lome
        Ee newa fwo ma-make I ome
        (chorus)
        Ree nie (garbled) ail zee
        Me tink (garbled) ee (garbled)
        (garbled) dwee Li'l Friskies
        (garbled) ack
        (garbled)
        (guitar solo)

That's it. I hope this was entertaining. All the arrows and stuff in parentheses is in the original strip, including the part that says "expletive". Too bad Bloom County ended though.. I like it better than "Outland".