Newsgroups: alt.folklore.urban
From: dw@unislc.slc.unisys.com (Dan Wright)
Subject: Convoluted FAQs Part II [REPOST]
Date: Mon, 15 Nov 1993 03:39:10 GMT
Wanking away gleefully to the mental image of AFU's FAQ, text paraphraser
Mark V. Shaney spooed forth shimmering ribbons of gibberish, some of which
made sense by accident. This time, MarkV showed a conspicuous tendency to
involve people's names in the convolution, so remember, any reference to
persons living or dead is simply desultory. Please load AFU's FAQ high in
your upper memory blocks before reading (in alphabetic order):
. A group of cows proposed a Sears catalog ad for sodomy.
. Bath water freezes faster than Terry's balls.
. Charles Lasner still lives in a weenie-looking car.
. Diesel engines emit more energy than 4 hits of acid swimming on my couch.
. Don't use a rat in your bathtub.
. Edison's last breath is trapped in a tuna can.
. Frat boys drank alcoholic beverages through a chicken's skull cavity.
. Insect lays eggs in Marilyn vos Savant's microwave.
. Jet lag is usually just an extra sympathy scam.
. Man fills wife's lover's convertible with aluminum siding.
. New Zealanders moan and groan during prohibition.
. Old Walt Disney's dead spirit found at drive-in movie.
. Old woman puts dog in different areas, Scotland Yard has epileptic fits.
. People (mostly guys) have been thrown to sea.
. Phil Collins' song "In the Microwave Tonight" refers to gerbils.
. Soldiers are so dumb they'll drown if they don't have a religion.
. Terry Wood proved we don't smell like Russian tanks.
. We never saw a mirror summon a dead spirit at high speed.
. little gator S. Mudgett can be genetically inherited.
Thus ends Convoluted FAQs II. If you never saw Convoluted FAQs Part I,
raise your hand. The DOS "text paraphraser" shareware can be had from
SIMTEL's mirror sites. Scan for the pattern markv*.zip.
