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From: splinter@panix.com (Tom Cikoski)
Newsgroups: alt.folklore.urban
Subject: Staff Cuts Loom at AFU, Inc.
Date: 21 Jan 1996 11:13:53 -0500

Staff Cuts Loom for AFU, Inc.

(New York) Hard on the heels of last week's report of softer than expected 4Q95 earnings from AFU, Inc., world's leading supplier of urban legends and associated products and services, comes news that may seduce the hearts of analysts, but wafted a frigid breeze through the corridors of AFU's massive underground NYC corporate headquarters. Upwards of 10,000 staff can expect to be trimmed sometime in the next four weeks.

"We really have no option but to make these cuts," said a company spokesperson. "We have to own up to our mistakes of the past few years and take the consequences. Staff cutbacks are the surest way, by God."

Although there were no specifics, industry watchers believe that the mention of "past mistakes" may be a reference to AFU's seeming inability to keep up with the demand swings in its volatile urban legend marketplace.

Last year, for example, demand rose rapidly in the spring. There followed a series of ups and downs in the market, some with deeper penetration than others, until sometime in the late fall when a gush of new product entries erupted. Demand has remained flaccid since then, and interest has waned. But industry pundits believe that the market could rebound, given the right external stimulation.

This means that AFU's announced intention to trim its staff may have come a very bad time, in spite of the low key tone of AFU's press release.

"These kinds of cutbacks occur every day," it said. "It really isn't as bad as people make out. Sure there is some initial pain, but soon the wounds heal and a leaner, more calloused work force arises from the surgery. No one should get worked up about it, one way or another."

AFU, Inc., has hired the Isreali firm of Mohel, Klipinsky, Skinner and Kranque to execute the cutbacks. About 10,000 workers are likely to be affected.

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